Turning the corner at 40



As I turn 40 this week,  I felt it is time to step back a little and take stock of life.

Life has been beautiful so far.  There have been some ups and not many downs.  There has always been a hand to hold, shoulders to cry on,  friends to gossip with,  siblings and cousins to hang out with,  hills to climb and rivers to cross.

The turbulent teens of self-consciousness, gawky looks, crushes were fun.  And so were the manic twenties when life was at full speed.  First job,  then some more jobs, some entrance tests and interviews in which I flunked royally.  Thought it was the end of the world.  But wait, life had better offers.   It was also the decade,  I got married and had my 2 beautiful children.  Then began the struggle to maintain family and career.  Always, always feeling guilty about not spending enough time with my sons.

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The thirties,  spent in building up careers, work-life balancing.  The boys were good company for each other,  and I felt less guilty.  It was a decade when I went abroad twice which made me Independent (yeah capital ‘I’), complete support from my husband and families.

So, now at 40,  the turbulent life is smoother now, or maybe I have got used to it.  I am older and wiser.  The children are grown up and not really dependent on me for small things.   I get to spend more time on my hobbies.  When I look back,  at 20, had I known, that life would eventually sort itself,  I wouldn’t have spent time worrying and crying on issues which look very trivial and silly now.  I should have been more relaxed at that age.  I wish I had the self-confidence, the wisdom, the freedoms, which I have now.

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But, they are all wrinkles or chapters added to my life book and which has made me the person I am today.

So, what next?  Now that I have satisfied my parents’ aspirations and my family is stable,  I guess it is time now to explore some more.   And I have a whole lot of things to do.  I would like to explore my options as a writer/blogger/fiction-writer/researcher or whatever it is but want to be connected with writing and finally getting published.   I also plan to travel a bit.  I plan to eventually retire and become a teacher or volunteer on some social cause like the ‘Teach India’ initiative and give back to society.

A whole lot of things to do and as said rightly said by Robert Frost ‘miles to go before I sleep’.

life definition